A Cure for a Cold Lonely Winter: Online Dating
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
POV: Bernie's Story
As a reporter for COGNEWS, I come across many people who, through no fault of their own, spend the Christmas and New Year season on their own. This may be due to the loss of a partner or having gone through the breakup of a relationship. The feeling of isolation can be quite painful, especially after a Christmas spent with relatives.
In this modern world, we don’t have the social connections we once had, and certainly in Cheadle isolation can be quite severe, we don’t have a community hall, dance hall etc. U3A is good for the retired and semi-retired, but for everyone else life can be difficult when it comes to making new friends.
This is where dating apps can be useful. Modern apps don’t automatically signal to others that you are looking for a relationship. Instead, you can specify walks, coffee breaks, or meeting for meals or dancing. Many people think dating apps are not for them, too complicated too impersonal but life has changed online, with many safeguards and options for individuals to choose from. By following a few simple rules, you can enhance your life with friends and live life fully.
Dating Do's & Don't s
Do - Be polite and try to find common interests, your hiking obsession might be on someone else's bucket list!
Don't - Dismiss apps which require a lot of input from you before you start - If the app asks for a lot of data, it is generally makes the site more secure. Some even do passport photo checks.
Do - Be aware that some sites are dominated by scammers who sound believable — and actually are not. If in doubt, ask them a local question, which they will not be able to answer if they are living in another country. Try to stay on the website rather than moving on to texting. Until you are certain they are credible. At which time its OK to use texting or social media of your choosing
Do - Wherever possible make sure that if you pay for a service, it is a single secure payment and not a standing order.
Do - Speak on the phone. Phone calls can help you sense from tone and conversation what type of person they are.
Do - Always select a public location such as a coffee shop for your first meeting, and listen for clues in their voice and watch eye contact to help indicate honesty.
Don't - Hide behind misleading photographs, always supply recent ones and don't use AI, Photoshop or Filters.
Do - and this is a hard one, mainly for men — present your best self, for example if you have put on a few pounds, you could try to lose them. You might be a warm, kind gentleman, but first impressions count, and a few extra inches around the waist may put a lady off before she gets to know you.
You are never too old to join a dating site. You can still meet someone in your 80s or 90s to fill the space left by misfortune. No one should end their life lonely and depressed when they could spend their last 10–20 years in happiness with a friend — even if that friend is just someone on the end of a telephone you chat to at the end of the day.
Let’s all be happier in the New Year.
A Cure for a Cold Lonely Winter: Online Dating - created 12th January 2026
